How XO Came to Mean Kisses and Hugs (2024)

How XO Came to Mean Kisses and Hugs (1)

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As Valentine’s Day draws near, candy hearts emblazoned with XOXO, as in “hugs and kisses,” remind us that love is in the air. But why XO? Why not AB? Or XY? It turns out that XO, which has been becoming ever more popular as an affectionate sign off for texts and emails, had a fascinating journey on the way to becoming the modern call sign of “hugs and kisses.”

Kiss-Cross: Why "X" Marks the Kiss

According to the Oxford English Dictionary, the earliest evidence of the letter X symbolizing a kiss dates back to 1878, in the novel Seaforth by Florence Montgomery: “This letter...ends with the inevitable row of kisses,—sometimes expressed by × × × × ×, and sometimes by o o o o o o…” But since writing’s uptake of novel usage tends to follow that of everyday speech, it is likely that X was used in conversational contexts to stand in for “kisses” even earlier in the 19th century.

Prior to the 19th century, X appears instead to have been used to signal a blessing, as found in this letter dating back to 1763: “I am with many a xxxxxxx and many a Pater noster and Ave Maria.” We also find textual evidence during this period that X was also used to symbolize crosses, or the making of the sign of the cross (for example, as mentioned in the 1719 novel Robinson Crusoe). So, it seems before kisses came blessings.

It may not appear that blessing and kissing have that much in common. Yet, a deeper look into history gives us a hint about how the meaning of X might have morphed into its more common “kisses” meaning of today.

Sealed with an X

Earlier in history, X had become associated with the name of Christ, i.e., as in “Xmas” for Christmas. Because of this link to Christianity, the letter itself came to represent faith, fealty and devotion. This came in handy during the Middle Ages when most people were illiterate, so they would stamp an X, likely symbolizing a cross, into the wax used to seal important documents and letters in lieu of a signature.

Sometimes, after marking this X into the sealing wax, people would then put their lips to the mark to bless it or to swear an oath. As well, holy books were often kissed as they were opened and closed, as a show of faith and respect. Thus, this “sealing with a kiss” as a symbolic act might have helped establish a link between the X that was a cross and the X that became a kiss.

In the 19th century, literacy and letter writing became more common and letters were sometimes signed off with X. This practice originally was likely intended as a blessing but, owing to the overlap described above, gradually came to be associated with a kiss.

How XO Came to Mean Kisses and Hugs (2)

Noughts and Crosses?

Source: Name_13/Pixabay

Uh Oh: How "O" Came to Symbolize (Mostly) Hugs

The origin of X’s co-conspirator O is less clear. There is some evidence that the letter O could also be used to represent kisses, as in the previously mentioned quote from the 19th Century novel Seaforth, where the choice of X or O depended “on the taste of the young scribbler.”

More commonly and in modern usage, though, O is taken to represent a hug rather than a kiss. This meaning appears to be much more recent, with textual evidence suggesting an early to mid-twentieth century origin.

And why a hug? That is a good question and theories abound. Perhaps because its circular shape brings to mind being encircled by arms in an embrace, or perhaps due to its long-standing relationship with X in the game known as “Noughts and Crosses,” a.k.a, Tic-Tac-Toe. One final theory suggests that, because of X’s religious history, turn of the century Jewish immigrants to Ellis Island chose to sign using an O, so as not to use a Christian symbol.

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Spread a little XO

No matter how the practice developed, modern texters and emailers have clearly embraced the friendly “give out a little love” vibe that XO projects. Using it with your boss or colleagues, though, might make for an awkward office party, so best to save your XOXO for those you really know and love.

References

Danesi, Marcel. 2013. The History of the Kiss: The Birth of Popular Culture. New York: Palgrave Macmillan

Epstein, Nadine. A whole lot of history behind ‘x’ and ‘o,’ kiss and hug. Washington Post. February 13, 2014.

Epstein, Nadine. The Secret History of X & O. Moment Magazine. March 4, 2014.

Oxford English Dictionary, s.v. “o (n.5),” July 2023, https://doi.org/10.1093/OED/6972745158. Accessed 1.14.23

Oxford English Dictionary, s.v. “X (n.),” September 2023, https://doi.org/10.1093/OED/9635674512. Accessed 1.14.23

How XO Came to Mean Kisses and Hugs (2024)

FAQs

How XO Came to Mean Kisses and Hugs? ›

The religious and literary history of "XOXO."

How did Xo become hugs and kisses? ›

X pictographically represents crossed arms of a hug and O represents lips puckering for a kiss.

What does it mean when someone says hugs and kisses? ›

Hugs and kisses, abbreviated in North America as XO or XOXO, is an informal term used for expressing sincerity, faith, love, or good friendship at the end of a written letter, email or text message.

How do you respond to XOXO? ›

Say it back when you want to match the sender's feelings.

“Back at ya!” for a friendly, casual response. “Xoxo to you too!” to be more energetic and personal. “Xoxoxo” as a jokey way to say “Even more hugs and kisses to you!”

What does Xxoo mean in a text message? ›

The "xxoo" in texts is a modern, shorthand way of sending hugs and kisses. It has its roots from the old letter-writing tradition—where "X" signified a kiss and "O" a hug.

Where does xo come from? ›

Anand also notes that the most popular theory behind the history of "XOXO" is rooted in Christianity. "Turns out, an X looks a bit like a cross, and it was seen as a salutation representing goodwill," he shares. Historians also say that X meant Christ, and it's a symbol they still see in medieval churches.

Is XO friendly or flirty? ›

XO stands for “hugs and kisses.” The X represents kisses, and the O represents hugs. It's typically used to express affection, romantic love, or deep friendship. XO is a common sign-off at the end of handwritten letters or birthday cards.

What does XOXO mean from a girl flirting? ›

Despite the complicated origins of these symbols, these days it is widely accepted that XOXO means “hugs and kisses.” In the United Kingdom, use of XX (meaning “kisses”) as a sign-off is particularly popular, though the practice remains less common in North America, where XOXO is the more common formulation.

Is XOXO romantic? ›

XOXO: When using double 'X' and 'O', it's like you're covering the other person in hugs and kisses. Usually, XOXO is reserved for a romantic partner, but occasionally, one might find it appropriate to use XOXO with a friend or family member in a text or note.

What can I say instead of XOXO? ›

The top 10 positive & impactful synonyms for “XOXO” are love hugs, kisses embrace, snuggles cheers, smooches wrap, hearts clasp, pecks cuddle, warmth bonds, cheers squish, affection squeeze, and blissful huddle.

What does XO ❤ mean? ›

Origin of XO1. From X , symbol for a kiss; O , symbol for a hug.

What is the difference between xo and XOXO? ›

XO is a shortened version of the commonly used XOXO, which is often used to send another person hugs and kisses.

How to use xo in a text? ›

XO is just another version of the popular phrase XOXO, meaning hugs and kisses that is used mostly in North America. At the conclusion of a written letter, email, or text message, it is also a colloquial expression for expressing honesty, faith, love, or good friendship.

When did people start saying XOXO? ›

The practice of pairing O with X as a sign-off in a letter as XOXO is a fairly modern one and didn't see widespread use until the 1960s. The TV series Gossip Girl also popularized its use, as each episode ended with a signature voiceover, “XOXO, Gossip Girl.”

Who founded XOXO? ›

XOXO was started by Gregg and Lynne Fiene in 1991 along with their partners, Marc and Michelle Bohbot (owners of Bisou Bisou). In 1999, annual sales reached $100 million but the company struggled financially.

What is the history of hugs? ›

No one knows exactly when the first hug occurred between two human beings, but we do know that hugs have been in the human behavioral repertoire for at least several thousand years. In 2007, a team of archeologist discovered the so-called “Lovers of Valdaro” in a Neolithic Tomb near Mantua in Italy (Stewart, 2007).

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